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Club Somehow Keeps Up Its Perfect 50 Percent Winning Rate

1st Thomas Reinke edged out two other three-and-oners to come in first place, going 3-1 +276. He opened his night by drawing most of the good tiles against Gail, leveraging his good fortune into a 478-286 victory. He then entered into a high scoring contest versus Bryan, coming out ahead 490-428. Both sides played three bingos: LENITED, LIRIOPES, and RHENIUMS for Thomas, PAVONINE (adj. pertaining to peacocks), ENTREATS and ODONATE for Bryan. Things slowed down a bit in his next game against Charles, with his only bingo being the phony FELONISM* (real word: FOILSMEN). A closed board spelled doom for Charles in that one, despite bingos of SCARRED and SCIAENID (n. a carnviorous fish). Sadly, or happily, depending on your allegiance, a chance at another undefeated night for him was spoiled by Lynda and her triple-triple of CROUTONS (n. crunchy salad things). He tried to keep it close, but his bingos of SCANTIER and NEUROMA were not enough.

2nd Charles Reinke came in second solely because he didn't challenge FELONISM* against Thomas. That was the only reason. If he had challenge that phony right off the board, he would have come in first, no question. But he didn't, and now he has to settle for second place, which is basically last place as far as I'm concerned. He started things off with a 496-328 win over Helen, featuring bingos of POUTINE (n. a dish of French fries, cheese curds, and gravy that represents a unique element of Canadian cultural heritage), AREOLAS, and the double-double CONVERSO for 98. Against Aaron, it was looking grim until he got down an unlikely MEATILY, also for 98. That, combined with PERITUS and BODHRANS, led to a 454-419 win. We already know how terribly he bungled his game against Thomas, but he recovered in time to beat Bryan, 382-291. Bryan's outbingo of ANSATED allowed him to get a semi-reasonable score, as Charles controlled the game and the board from the outset.

3rd Lynda Finn averaged 430 points per game on her way to a 3-1 +204 record, enough for third place. She got her losing out of the way early, falling 397-558 to Bryan and his four bingos of SPORTIER, WELSHING, POINTIER, and TELEMEN. She did get down the somewhat similar-looking bingos of OUTRAGE and OVERAGES, but there's not much to do when your opponent ends up scoring 558. In the second round Lynda got revenge, if not on Bryan, on the cruel vagaries of fate, scoring 482 against Sue and playing LOAMIER, ELOINED, and BLASTING. Aaron was the next in lane to feel her fury, as she won 420-339, playing word-of-the-week PIGOUTS and FETIALS (n. a priest of ancient Rome). Club veterans will remember a long-retired prize for playing certain words as determined by the director. PIGOUTS was one of those words that earned the five dollars, but Lynda was about a decade late in playing it. If she wishes, she can make an appeal. Her triple-triple CROUTONS was the deciding factor in her final match victory of Thomas, but she also made a series of good defensive plays to seal the win.

Turkey-Induced Coma Cannot Prevent this Writeup from Being Written

(Or: To Discuss Scrabble Whilst Residing in the Hazy Realm Between Consciousness and Unconsciousness)

1st Thomas Reinke averaged 464 points per game against a lineup of tough players, but failed to attain the lossless record usually required for first place, going 3-1 +321. To kick off the pre-Thanksgiving festivities, he pummeled his brother Charles by a score of 461-320, getting down bingos of BREEDERS and MAESTRO to Charles' UNEARNED. The second round saw him record his only loss as he fell to Bryan Benwitz 402-431. Bryan utilized the "bingo more often than your opponent" strategy to great effect, with his three bingos (ERODABLE, HOVELING, NONSUIT) clearly outnumbering Thomas' two bingos (SENARII and SEAPORT). Thomas took note of that strategy and adopted it as his own in his next match against Aaron Bader, which he ran away with, 542-397. Aaron was limited to the oddly-spelled INTRENCH as his only bingo, while Thomas' bingos were fourfold: VILAYETS, GASOLIER, STEEVING, and the word of the week ATARAXIC (n. ATARAXIA, a state of serene calmness). In the final game, Thomas secured his 3-1 record by taking down Lynda Finn in a closer game, 449-385. He again drew upon his knowledge of obscure X-bingos with a find of PURLIEUX, and also added the more sedate RONTGEN to his bingo list.

2nd Bryan Benwitz similarly went 3-1, with a +220 spread. Sources indicate that he gives thanks for the 3-1 record, but would definitely be giving more thanks if he had went 4-0. His first game, against Gail Salm, was a display of high-probability bingo prowess which Bryan won, 478-313. Gail got ENTRAINS down, but Bryan outdid that with his ETESIAN, SNOUTED, and DEEWANS. Bryan followed that up with a previously-described victory over first-place finisher Thomas Reinke, then matched up with the other undefeated player at that point, a full-of-confidence Helen Flores. Helen did not manage a bingo in her bout with Bryan (who had POLICES and GRAYEST), but kept the game close, losing 376-436. After that win, Bryan was the one who had reason to be confident, but his vision of an undefeated evening was trampled upon by Charles Reinke in a 405-439 match. Bryan utilized the -ING suffix twice with bingos of SEDATING and SWEETING (the latter being a type of apple - therefore, no SWEETED), while Charles had TOFFEES and IRRUPTS (the anagram of STIRRUP).

3rd Helen Flores made a triumphant return to the top three with her 3-1 +75 outing in which she averaged an impressive 401 points per game, almost fifty points more than her yearly average. Having discovered a new strategy of "don't let your opponent bingo even once", she immediately put it into use against Lynda Finn, winning their first-round encounter by a score of 386-363 while getting down PARADED and ENCASED. She then utilized that strategy a second time when matched up against Aaron Bader, playing CONTESTS, OUTFLIES, and a game-stealing outbingo of AGREEING to win 411-359. She ran into a roadblock when she faced off against Bryan Benwitz, but recovered her composure in the final round against Richard Lauder and took the victory, 432-372. Richard had three bingos (ETHIONS, STONERS, and GATEMEN) to Helen's one (TAILING), but Helen scored more than enough with her high-scoring non-bingo plays to guarantee the win.

Lynda Fails To Live Up To "Finnisher" Nickname

1st Lynda Finn won her first three games decisively, then feigned tiredness to avoid the frightening prospect of a loss, ending up at 3-0 +335, good for first paragraph privileges. She and Mary both played a bingo apiece in their opening-round match, HUNTERS for Lynda and ALIENATE for Mary, but somehow Lynda found enough points in other places to win, 430-322. In the second round, she faced David who, brimming with confidence after beating Thomas, came face to face with a bingo cannon. Lynda played four bingos: DINKIER, ANIMALS, OUTFACES, and GLORIOUS (how appropriate) in that 438-316 victory. Her bingoing continued in a 458-343 win against Bryan, with BONKERS, HOARDING, and ATONERS (n. one that atones, I didn't even have to look that one up). Bryan played ASSUAGE as his sole rack-clearer, which isn't as funny-looking as ASSWAGE. With a final bingo ratio of 8 for Lynda and 2 for her opponents, I'd say that outbingoing your opponent is a good strategy for winning games.

2nd Bryan Benwitz came in second place with a 3-1 +181 record. He opened things up with yet another win over Charles, 478-345. Bryan has now won (palindrome alert!) four out of the last five in the head-to-head matchup. For those interested, he is holding a "How to beat Charles" class next Wednesday. Tickets are 50 dollars, limited availability. Don't miss your chance to learn from the master! After his usual destruction of Charles, he turned his attention to Aaron, who he beat 411-350. Bryan is now 1 for his last 1 against Aaron, another impressive feat! Bryan's "win every game" strategy took a hit against Lynda, as he faced an insurmountable amount of bingos, but he recovered against Gail, 443-341. He only got down one bingo that game, but it was a nice one, ENTENTES (n. an agreement between nations).

3rd Charles Reinke lost his first game but didn't go home right away, sticking around for three more games of Scrabble and winning them all, finishing at 3-1 +119. He lost, predictably, to Bryan in the first round, and as an act of vengeance defeated Dave in the next round 510-303. He got away with the phony PYRESIS* in that one, trying to form a noun out of the adjective PYRETIC. Try PYREXIA next time, dude. Charles had to use all the tricks in his book to overcome Richard's FOREPAST for 98 in the third round, eventually prevailing 391-368. His night concluded with a familiar matchup against Thomas, except this time they weren't battling for first. Charles took control of the game early with VAUNTIE and STYMIED, and Thomas couldn't make up the difference in time, losing 463-485, the highest losing score of the year so far.

Gail played the word-of-the-week, QUINTICS. A QUINTIC is a type of mathematical function, and reading the wikipedia page for it is hurting my brain. Not recommended.