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New Location, Same Game

1st Bryan Benwitz came out on top in the club's first night at Festival Foods, sneaking into first place with a 3-1 +314 record, a mere two spread points preventing him from relgation into the second paragraph. He started out with a 465-342 win against Dennis, where he played CASETTES, DINGIES, and DRAWEES. Dennis got down a double-blank UNVOICED, but he probably wished those blanks had come at separate times so he could bingo twice with them. Anyone brave enough to try exchanging one of them so you can draw it back and bingo again? No? Anyway, he followed up that win with another in the second game, this time verus Charles, 461-370. He played the nine-letter ENSHRINED (ENSHRINEE is also good), while Charles' missed DISAVOW cost him, if not the game, a lot of spread points. Bryan had his highest scoring game of the night against Dave, dropping 510 and getting LEGIONS, FONDEST, and SYRINGA (n. an ornamental shrub, also known as "lilac"). He lost his final game against Thomas, 389-481, but it was also sort of a victory, because the difference wasn't enough for his opponent to secure first place, and that's all that matters. Except we don't give money for first place.

2nd Thomas Reinke's 3-1 +312 record was good for second place, which seems good if you ignore how close he was to first. His night got off to a phony start with his early bingo of CHAZENS* being no good (CHAZZEN, CHAZAN, and KHAZEN are all good, and all mean the same thing). He used that ill-gotten advantage to win 509-281 against Gail. He avoided playing any phonies against Dave in the second round, but maybe he should've, because he lost, 386-426. He played COGNISED and TAILBONE, but they both only scored 64, and Dave was able to get down three bingos of his own, HORSING, MILTING, and MOLESTS, the last blocking Thomas' hopeful bingo and sealing the win. In the third round, his next opponent, Charles, got off to a quick start with a double-double PIPEAGES, but found his luck ran out there. Thomas won that contest 405-373 with bingos of BEAMIEST and OVERRIDE. Against Bryan in the final, he watched CANTEEN go down before playing three bingos of his own, SATINIER, TOLEWARE, and a double-blank word-of-the-week YEOMANRY. In case you think that last one is cool, maybe it is, but Bryan had already played it in a game in 2014, and so was wholly unimpressed. That word joins ENTRYWAY, LAYAWAYS, and SYNKARYA (!?) as the only double-Y bingos played. Only about 200 more to go! Remember to look for the always-fruitful -NYMY ending.

3rd Betty Hasselkus, normally mild-mannered, came out swinging, and not only was she swinging, she was connecting as well, and ended up coming in third place with a 3-1 +187 record and averaging 407 per game. She started off slow, losing to Helen 335-427 and not bingoing. Things rapidly picked up after that, as she beat Dennis 415-303 in the next game. Betty played MARTINS (n. a small bird) and BALKIER (also BAULKIER) to win that one. If you thought that was good, her next game will blow your mind: a 4-bingo 508-point explosion against Lynda. That's Betty's highest score since we started keeping track, as well as 4 doubling her previous high in bingos played. EMERIES, TACKING, FAILINGS (after the plausible LEAFINGS* got challenged off), and TINGLES were her bingos. That was a tough act to follow, but she did get another win in the final game, 370-316 against Sue, playing DESIGNS. That win earned her prestigious third-paragraph honors; perhaps next week she can aim for second?

If Each Win Was Worth A Quarter, Lynda Would Have a Whole Dollar

1st Lynda Finn lived up to her "Finnisher" nickname (she might claim that that is not her nickname but guess what it is now), going 4-1 -9, good for first place. In the first round she dispatched Betty, 377-354, with a bingo of PORKIER. Betty got down SWEARER, making UPPINGS (n. UPPING, the process of marking young swans for identification purposes, but we all knew that) for 101, drawing a challenge. Lynda's negative spread was entirely a result of her next game, a 312-551 loss to Bryan. To add insult to injury, her sole bingo was a phony HOTPADS*, while Bryan played OUTLIER, DREAMING, and TOUGHED. In the third round she faced two opponents at once (who will be the first brave soul to face three at once????), beating Helen in a close one, 396-388, and David, 416-283. Her final game was also her best, a 504-438 win against reigning club champ Charles. Charles played TORSADES and FEASANCE (like MALFEASANCE except neutral), while Lynda got ALAMODES (n. a silk fabric), TONTINE, and HERIOTS. That last one secured the win by scoring 108 big points on a non-bingo-friendly board, with the word having to end with O?S. Charles pretended to not be too upset, but insider sources say he cried profusely once everyone else had left the church.

2nd Aaron Bader went 3-1 +398, missing out on a chance for first place by leaving a game early. He got his losing out of the quickly against Charles in the first round, 383-465. He did get down the word-of-the-week EPERGNES, but it wasn't enough against Charles' SAHUARO, PLENTIES, and OBELIAS. In the next round, he played two, Betty and Dave. Against Betty, he won 409-310, countering Betty's COUNTED with his own ORANGES. And Against Dave, he won 484, getting down LANIARY (n. a canine tooth), and PRERIOT (angram PIERROT). Things got off to a good start in his final game, versus Bryan, when he opened with NEUSTON (n. an aggregate of small aquatic organisms). He then got the double-double CASTLED, and finished with SEDILIA, while Bryan could hardly get anything going. The final ended up being 485-295, and with that, he decided he'd had enough Scrabble for the night. Heh. As if anyone could ever have enough Scrabble!

3rd Charles Reinke came in third with a 3-1 +370 record and a pretty decent average of 477 per game. He beat Aaron in the first round, but we already know all about that, so we'll go straight to his second-round game versus David, which he won 429-255. He got down DEPUTING and RASHEST in that one, to go along with most of the good tiles. His bingoing took a sharp swing upward against Thomas in the next game, when he played five rack-clearers in a 576-396 victory. For the bingo-curious: REBATERS (never play BERATERS*), DADAISMS, VALENCES, ANTIGENE, and TOADYING. The 7 combined bingos in that game is tied for most this season in any game. Charles' chances at an undefeated night were stymied (or stimied) by Lynda in the last round, 438-504. And that's okay. He's gone undefeated enough times, don't you think?

26 More Unique Games of Scrabble Added to the Universe's Total

1st Aaron Bader, as he is prone to do, out-Scrabbled all the other assembled Scrabblers, going undefeated with a 4-0 +297 record. His night was not without fault, however: he won his first game against Gail 454-381 aided in part with the phony of FELICIA*. While it may be good in certain other English-language Scrabble dictionaries that he may or may not have also studied from, it is sadly unacceptable here in the States. He ran into no such problems in his next game against Thomas, where he won easily 508-334 after successfully challenging off Thomas' phony SOOTLIKE* and sending him (Thomas, not Aaron) into a tailspin of failed fishing attempts. Aaron played TANGELO (n. a hybrid of a tangerine and a pomelo) and BRAINIER (how appropriate) in that one. He only got down one bingo against Charles, SUFFERS, but used a large early lead as insurance to win, 402-355. His final test was a game against the 3-1 Helen; he passed, but barely, needing to execute a Q-stick to win by 3, 412-409. I thought QI solved this problem?

2nd Thomas Reinke went 4-1 +617, a huge spread that was, dare I say it, wasted on second place. He picked up all that spread in the first round, where in a 2-on-1 against Mary and Dennis he played 9 bingos and scored 607 and 598 points. A full list of the bingos would take up approximately three extra paragraphs; see appendix A.1: Bingos for the details. His fortunes took a dramatic turn in the second game as he lost by 174 to Aaron, though he did play the appropriate TATTERS (anagrams STRETTA and TARTEST). In the third round, he faced Bryan (who had a two-game winning streak against him), and won 479-372. He played RETASTE, REINSMAN, and the nine-letter INTEGRATE while holding Bryan unusually bingo-less. Finally, he went up against his twin, and wouldn't you know it, the game was extremely close, with Thomas beating Charles 446-444. Thomas' late SPINOSE was the key to victory in that one.

3rd Charles Reinke went 3-2 +275, coming in third because somehow no one finished 3-1. I'm too lazy to check, but I'm just going to guess that that's never happened before. Anyway, he started off with a win against Bryan 423-386, his LETTERED (another appropriate bingo!!!!!!) and MALAISE overcoming Bryan's lone PRIMROSE. In the second round he faced two opponents: he beat Dave 410-269 and Gail 471-325. Unlike Thomas, who played nine bingos in his two-on-one (just in case you forgot I wanted to remind everybody), Charles only played three total: BORNEOL against Dave, and MELOIDS and SEARING (there are eight words in those letters and he chose the lamest one) against Gail. Against Aaron, he played POINTES (as in, the play scored 65 pointes) and TALCIER, but lost 355-402. Against Thomas, he got down the double-double TITRANTS as well as OUTRANKS, but couldn't somehow scrounge together two extra points over the whole game to at least get a tie. Only two points! That's like, putting a one-point tile next to another one-point tile and that's it. Easy.